Polyamory Diaries 12: Can A Marriage Survive Without Sex

When it comes to relationships, there's no denying the importance of physical intimacy. But what if I told you that love can thrive without it? It may sound surprising, but many couples have found ways to connect on a deeper level without relying solely on physical touch. Whether it's through emotional support, open communication, or shared values, there are plenty of ways to cultivate a strong and meaningful connection with your partner. So, if you're curious about exploring the depths of love beyond the physical, check out this article to learn more about the different dimensions of intimacy.

Welcome back to the Polyamory Diaries series, where we explore the ins and outs of non-monogamous relationships. In today's installment, we'll be diving into the question that many couples grapple with: can a marriage survive without sex?

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The Role of Sex in a Marriage

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Sex is often considered an integral part of a romantic relationship, and for many couples, it plays a crucial role in maintaining intimacy and connection. However, the importance of sex in a marriage can vary greatly from couple to couple. Some individuals place a high value on sexual intimacy, while others may prioritize emotional connection, companionship, and shared interests.

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For some couples, a lack of sexual activity can be a source of tension and frustration, leading to feelings of disconnect and dissatisfaction. However, it's important to note that not all marriages require regular sexual activity to thrive. In fact, many couples are able to maintain a strong, loving partnership without engaging in sexual activity at all.

Understanding Asexuality

One factor to consider when discussing the role of sex in a marriage is asexuality. Asexuality is a sexual orientation characterized by a lack of sexual attraction or interest in sexual activity. Asexual individuals may still experience romantic attraction and desire for emotional intimacy, but they do not feel a need for sexual connection in their relationships.

For asexual individuals, being in a marriage without sex may not be a source of distress or dissatisfaction, as they simply do not have the same desire for sexual intimacy as others. It's important for partners to have open and honest conversations about their needs and boundaries when it comes to physical intimacy, and to find a balance that works for both parties.

Communication and Compromise

In any marriage, communication is key. When it comes to navigating a lack of sexual activity, it's crucial for partners to have open and honest conversations about their needs, desires, and boundaries. This may involve exploring alternative forms of intimacy, such as cuddling, kissing, or engaging in non-sexual physical activities that still foster connection and closeness.

It's also important for partners to be willing to compromise and find creative solutions that meet both of their needs. This may involve seeking support from a therapist or relationship counselor to navigate the challenges of a sexless marriage and find ways to maintain emotional and physical intimacy without traditional sexual activity.

Exploring Non-Monogamy

For some couples, the option of non-monogamy may provide a solution to the challenges of a sexless marriage. By opening up their relationship to include other partners, couples can experience sexual connection and fulfillment outside of their primary relationship, while still maintaining the emotional bond and commitment to their spouse.

Polyamory, in particular, offers a framework for ethical and consensual non-monogamy, allowing individuals to form multiple romantic and sexual connections with the full knowledge and consent of all parties involved. This can provide a way for couples to navigate a lack of sexual activity in their marriage while still prioritizing emotional connection and partnership.


In conclusion, the question of whether a marriage can survive without sex is a complex and deeply personal one. While sex can play an important role in many relationships, it's not necessarily a requirement for a marriage to thrive. By prioritizing open communication, compromise, and exploring alternative forms of intimacy, couples can navigate a lack of sexual activity and maintain a strong and fulfilling partnership.

Whether through embracing asexuality, seeking support from a therapist, or exploring non-monogamous options, couples can find ways to navigate the challenges of a sexless marriage and prioritize the emotional connection and commitment that are at the heart of their relationship.